Do Long Distance Relationships Work

Advice by: Emily Downing
Place: Buffalo, New York, USA

-- Do Long Distance Relationships Work?
-- If they generally don't, then are they still worth trying?
-- But, if they do, what is the success rate of such LDRs?

Sure there are these and many more questions that pop up in your mind when you are deciding to separate from your spouse or boyfriend/girlfriend!

Understanding Individual Behavior & the Implications...
1. As human beings living in large cities among various amazing and interesting people, our minds are driven with temptations!
Implication -- Cheating in Relationships

2. As human beings living in a fast-paced competitive world, our aspirations are only fulfilled with immense struggle, hard work and crazy schedules!
Implication -- Less common time for both to Video Chat on Skype or Instant Messenger

3. Being human, we are cursed with the emotion of insecurity when our loved ones are out of sight not just for days or weeks, but months and even years at times!
Implication -- Constant burden of Paranoia who your partner is meeting, what is their social circle, etc

4. Lacking powers of a Super-Human, we are short of the ability to feel the emotion and tone of words exchanged through emails, Skype, Gtalk, Instant Messengers, etc!
Implication -- Misunderstandings

(Here is a more detailed understanding of the problems that you do come across in Long Distance Relationships)
These problems aren't meant to scare you away from having a Long Distance Relationship, but to educate you what you are up against. Go through the LDR Guide to learn how to survive the distance.

You are discouraged to have an LDR if:
1. You are just chat buddies. It is because you haven't experienced the person in real life. Real life behavior is largely different from online behavior.

2. You have been together for a very short span of time like 5-6 months only and you have to separate due to a job or school/university, etc.

3. You have arguments and difference of opinions more often than a common consensus on issues.

4. You both do not see your ends converging somewhere in future.

For couples who fall in none of those categories, you are safe to go ahead with a Long Distance Relationship. All you need is to show some discipline to follow this advice and these tips.

Success Rate of LDRs
The success rate of Long Distance Relationships is somewhere in the range of 50-60% according to surveys carried out by AC Nielsen among 3000 couples living in large cities around the world. Majority of the failures in LDRs occur when the couples fall in one of the 4 categories mentioned above and the remaining ones fail due to lack of knowledge on how to handle the distance.

At the end of the day, it is your effort, knowledge and commitment towards your relationship that will really answer "Do Long Distance Relationships Work? "

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Anonymous said...

My wife & I have known each other for just 3 months and now I have to take up a job in another country; she is in Asia and I will be in Europe...
Please advise how I should be handling this?

Bonita said...

The success rate of Long Distance Relationships seems to be pretty weak. If 5 out of every 10 couples break up in a long distance, is it even worth getting into one?

Anonymous said...

YES :)LDR is totally worth it! If you're in true love no distance can ruin it. YES. It is tough. Very very tough! In my case I can meet my better half like once-twice in 6 months. BUT I'm loving my relation and if God wills, WE WILL have a future together.. Hope so :)
If you're willing to do it..nothing is impossible.. :)

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